The Clean Cup
The Clean Cup.
The second paid job I ever had was as the "ice boy" at a local nursing home (that's what they were called back then). Once the ice pitchers were filled, I had the job of feeding the patients and cleaning up before I went home - about 3 hours per evening. My brief tenure at this home taught me more than I bargained for at 15-16 years of age. I observed families in good times and bad, struggling relationships, tough decisions, and, of course, dementia.
All who had dementia, struggled with it - the patient and the family. But, what I observed most was the different responses to dementia. Some patients handled it well. Others didn't.
Which brings me back to my uncle. Regardless of his battle with dementia, he was a dear, kind, loving, Christ-following man until the very, very end. Because I've known him all my life as such a man, it would be easy to assume that he would naturally be that always. However, as I spoke with my cousins and Aunt, his wife, I noticed something else that may be more of the story.
Uncle Tom simply refused to be bitter.
The Savior, in Matthew 23:25-26, rebukes the Pharisees in this way:
"Woe to you, teachers of the law and Pharisees, you hypocrites! You clean the outside of the cup and dish, but inside they are full of greed and self-indulgence. Blind Pharisee! First clean the inside of the cup and dish, and then the outside also will be clean."
As my uncle ministered to others for decades as a pastor and brother in Christ, dealing with joys and challenges, heart-warmth and heartbreak, he was known to quickly forgive. He was also known NOT to speak a harsh word against another. As his dementia progressed, his kids would ask him to remember events of the past. Can you guess which memories were the first to be forgotten? The bitter ones. The ones that hurt. Memories of those who rose up against his leadership, saying things they regret now, were the first memories to go.
Could it be that this is another practical result of applying God's Word in our lives? Jesus' admonishment to quickly forgive and move on - might it be also that God is simply preparing us for an eternity with Him by helping us, early on, focus on what will be important to us later rather than on what will eventually fade?
Clean the inside of the cup.
Do you feel bitter? Let it go. Resentment? Drop it. Unforgiveness? Forgive already and move on. I'm not saying it will be easy. It might be the hardest thing you've ever done. But, the stakes are pretty high.
I believe that Uncle Tom understood that God's ways were (and are) best. Each one prepares us for an eternity with Him. No matter how narrow or wide - or how difficult.
"Blessed are the pure in heart, for they will see God." Matthew 5:8
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